Spiritual Doubt

Ah doubt there you are again! Doubt is one thing everyone one experiences at some point in their lives. Whether doubt about a relationship, your abilities, or anything else in your life. Today I am going to talk about when doubts creep up in your Spirituality.
   So things seem to be running along smoothly enough, you have developed a rhythm so to speak in your spirituality. You are learning, reading, chatting. Then you let things slide a little maybe you stop praying, or stop doing rituals. Don't worry everyone is guilty of this even me. So time goes by and you start to think hmmm. Is this for me? What if I don't want to do full rituals for every Sabbat? What if I am not doing "something" the right way? Do the God's and Goddess really hear me? How come it doesn't feel like they are around me anymore?
  Well fear not!! Everyone on on the Journey will ponder, and doubt and wonder. It is all part of the learning experience. So what if you "fell of the spiritual wagon". You can just jump right back on. Lets start with the first question:
 Is this for me? This is a good question to meditate on. Everyone at some time asks this question. Maybe the question should not be is this for me?. Maybe the question should be is this the right Path for me? Maybe you were right into the Celtic Path, absorbing all the knowledge you could regarding the Celtic path. Then it feels like you hit a wall. My answer would be to mediate on this question and to start learning about other Path's such as Druid or Fairy. Maybe you will discover that one of these path's suit you more. Or maybe you are Eclectic and that is why just one path doesn't feel right. Journal, meditate and pray, pay attention to signs around you. The answer may come from the most unlikely place.

What if I don't want to do full rituals for every Sabbat?. The simple answer is you don't have to. Finding a way to acknowledge the Sabbats in a personal way is just fine. You don't have to do full rituals to let the God's and Goddess's know you are acknowledging them. Maybe decorate your alter with something that reminds you of that Sabbat. Have a special meal, share a special story, say a special prayer. Or just thank the God's and Goddess's for the turning of the wheel.

What if I am not doing "something" the right way? What is it you don't think you are doing the right way? Every path and every Pagan or Wiccan has a way of doing something. If you are worried that maybe you are not opening and closing the circle during ritual the right way, it is okay to have notes with you during ritual, especially if you are just starting out. No one has everything memorized. When setting up my alter I still double check from my Book Of Shadow's the Placement of candles, and elements.

Do the God's and Goddess's really hear me? The simple answer is yes they do. But maybe you should ask yourself do you hear them?

How come it doesn't feel like they are around me anymore? I will answer this with a question similar to the previous. Do you hear them? Are you paying attention? They are not some being in the sky who is never around. They are in everything in nature around you. Maybe go for a walk, and listen to the wind, the trees, the birds. Pay attention to the ever changing cycle of nature. Little by little you will notice things again.

I would say pay attention, slow down some. Life runs by so fast that we often loose touch with nature and the Spirit's with in nature. The God's and The Goddess's are often trying to show you something or lead you some way, but it is not likely to be a slap on your forehead. Maybe an image keeps popping up, maybe you keep meeting someone in your dreams. Don't worry you will find your way!

Have a Blessed Day
)0(

Never Stop Learning!

Like everything else in life you should never stop learning! This is true in Paganism as well, I believe you can never truly know everything there is to learn as the information out there is vast. Everyone has an opinion or a variation on a belief. Paganism is an umbrella term for many different earth paths, the only way you are ever going to learn which path is right for you is to never stop exploring. It is always okay to add to your knowledge, and to add new rituals. Paganism is a lot of things but defiantly not boring!
  When learning and exploring your are going to come across stuff that just is not going to sit right for you in your gut. That is okay you are not going to agree with everything. Then one day you will be reading something and you are going to feel it with every fiber of your being that is the right path for you. Your spirit will just know. Some people describe it as a feeling of coming home. It sounds cliche I know but the first time I discovered Paganism and Wicca that is exactly what it felt like. Every time I discover something new that adds to my knowledge you just know that this information is right for you.
   You are going to come across a lot of it "should be done this way", or "don't read that author". I say throw caution to the wind and read what ever you can get your hands on. Read about Paganism history, read about different paths, rituals, prayers, about the many deities, Sabbat's, and about Paganism in the news. Discover different web boards and facebook groups. Ask questions and remember just like any group of people you are going to run across people you just don't jive with, or people that just are not nice. Don't let that detour you from your journey. That's the great thing about Journey's they never truly end.

My Pagan Book shelf:

 I am always trying to add to it so as of the date this is written this is what I have. It is not a lot if you consider I bought my first book when I was a teenager. If you are going to buy a book try and wait for them to come on sale if you can. Your library will probably carry a selection of books on Wicca and Paganism, as well as other Earth Based Religions. A great resource as well is Good Reads here you can look up books, create bookshelves and read reviews on books before you buy them, or read them.

• The Wicca Book of Days Legends and Lore for every day of the year By Gerina Dunwich
• Wicca A guide for The Solitary Practitioner By Scott Cunningham
• The Way of the Green Witch By Arin Murphy-Hiscock
• Paganism: An introduction to Earth-Centered Religions By Joyce Higginbotham and River Higginbotham
• The Wiccan's Dictionary of Prophecy and Omens By Gerina Dunwich
• Goddess in my Pocket By Patricia Telesco
• The Wicca Spellbook By Gerina Dunwich
• Simple Wicca By Michele Morgan
• Wicca Candle Magick by Gerina Dunwich
• A Witches Bible The complete Witches' Handbook By Janet and Stewart Farrar
• Yule A celebration of Light and Warmth By Dorothy Morrison
• Candlemas Feast of Flames By Amber K and Azrael Arynn K
• The Wiccan Prayer Book By Mark Ventimiglia
• Pagan Magical Kit By Barbara Moore
• Encyclopedia of Wicca and Witchcraft 2nd Edition By Raven Grimassi
• Wicca for Life The way of the Craft from Birth to Summerland By Raymond Buckland 

Happy reading
Have a blessed day  )0(

What Paganism is and is not, a quick glance.

 What Paganism/Wicca is:

• An earth based religion in which nature is held dear. That all things from trees to animals and everything is between is sacred.
• There are many Paths that one may choice to follow
• The belief in Karma or the rule of three what ever you put out good or bad comes back to you three times. 
• That there is both a male and female God. The belief that there is polarity in things. Good and Bad, Dark and light, Male and Female.
• Following the wheel of the year, and the turning of the seasons. 
• Acknowledge the Sabbat's
• Following the moon cycle 
• Believe in the concept of "Harm None"
• The belief in rencarnation 

What it is not:

• A cult any more then any other religion is. 
• We do not sacrifice animals
• We are not satanists
• We do not believe in hell
• Or the devil 
• We are not like the Girls from the Craft, or Charmed or interest show here
• We do not go around casting spells on people
• Or run around naked all the time

I will probably continue to add to this list as time goes on. These are the quick basics of what Paganism is and is not. 

So it's hump day today (Wednesday)

Symbols

Symbols are a part of every religion, Neo-Paganism is no different. There are loads of symbols!!! So I thought I would go over some of the symbols, not all there are far to many to post here.

Lets start with some of the most recognized symbols.

The Pentacle/ Pentagram is one of the most recognized symbols in Wicca and Paganism. It's meaning : The pentacle is a five pointed star within a circle, the points representing the four elements fire, water, earth & air and  spirit and the circle represents eternity   

The Triple Goddess : Shows the moon phases, waxing, full and waning. It also  represents the stages of a women's life Maiden, Mother and Crone.

Triquetra : As well as also representing Maiden, Mother, Crone it is also a symbol of protection. There are also many other meanings for this symbol. I use it as a symbol of protection. Want to learn other meanings? Triquetra meanings

The Spiral Goddess a sign of life. The spiral represents the ever continuing cycle of life, death and rebirth

The Horned God represents the masculine polarity of the universe. (the male God)

Here are some other symbols that can be used in spell work, ritual, and inscribing on tools.

Pagan Widdershins Symbol	Pagan Yonic Symbol	Winter Pagan Symbol
Pagan Witch Symbol	Pagan Rebirth Symbol	Pagan Blessing Symbol
Cause Sleep Symbol	Pagan Crone Symbol	Deadly Symbol
Pagan Deosil Symbol	Summer Symbol	Pagan Friendship Symbol
Travel Symbol	Pagan Fertility Symbol	Fall Symbol
Earth Symbol	Pagan Protection Symbol	Pagan Health Symbol
Lose Weight Symbol	Pagan Love Symbol	Magick Circle
Magick Energy Symbol	Magick Strength Symbol	Maiden Symbol
Pagan Marriage Symbol	Pagan Money Symbol	Mother Symbol
Pagan Peace Symbol	Pagan Spirituality Symbol	Spring Symbol
Pagan Water Symbol	Pentagram Symbol	Protect Child Symbol
	Psychic Awareness Symbol	Pagan Purification Symbol

Have a Blessed Day!!!!!
)0(

Coming out of the "Broom Closet"

Are you still in the broom closet? Or maybe you have come out to a few friends and family, maybe you are a "public" Pagan. Some people feel comfortable talking about their religion or spirituality with others for some it is more of a private matter. Some Pagan's find a coven and others for several reasons may choose to practice Solitary. I am solitary one of the reasons being no coven's in my area, the other is that my practice is very personal to me. Being Eclectic it would be hard to find a coven because there is no particular path I follow.

There are several ways you can show you are Pagan. Maybe you wear a small pentacle/pentagram, or a ring. Maybe you have a tattoo or two. I have a pentacle/pentagram necklace, have a small ring, plus tattoos. I have four tattoo's in total. Two are Pagan related. A chest piece of the triple moon, and and a wrist tattoo of the triquetra Wikki Triquetra Symbol and meaning.


     I can honestly say no one other then friends and family have asked me about the meanings of jewelry I am wearing. My chest tattoo has brought up a couple of conversations but mainly with tattoo enthusiasts. (Having become more modest my chest tattoo is covered almost all the time) Sometimes other Pagan's or Wiccan's will recognize the symbols and we strike up a conversation and a kin ship seems to develop. Maybe I would run into more questions if I went out in public more, but my severe anxiety keeps me a little more house bound then others.  
  
   If you do wear something you should be prepared for questions, sometimes even stares. Have something in mind to say, and decided what you feel comfortable explaining or saying. Sometimes a simple it has religious meaning will do the trick. If some one starts to harass you try not to get angry, say what you need to say calmly and walk away. Even though Paganism is a relativity old religion through out history we have been painted with a bad light and misconceptions run wild. 
  
   I have heard we are devil worshipers, that we sacrifice animals, that people should be afraid of us because we will use so called "black magic" on them. Witches, and Pagan's use to get blamed for crop failures, and we have been persecuted through out time. We should never forget the burning times. It was reasons such as these that most Pagans and Witches went underground, and became secret.

  Now as time goes on and laws have come in place in some countries protecting religious beliefs we are slowly starting to come out of the wood work. So it is up to us as a community to stand by each other and dispel misconceptions about our religion.   


Links 
About.com Were the Burning Times as Bad as They Sound 
Real Pagan Real World Pagan Network : How to come out of the Broom Closet 
About.com How to come out of the broom closet 

 Some thoughts if you do decide to come out of the broom closet. 

1. Be prepared with enough knowledge about Paganism to answer questions.
2. Be prepared for some bizarre questions
3. The other person might not take it well, be prepared for this possible reaction.
4. Have websites or books you can give the other person to tell the TRUTH about Paganism 
5. If the other person does not take it well right away, give them time they may come around.

Some final thoughts for today 

Religion means something different to everyone, and the choice to discuss should be yours. When deciding to come out of the broom closet think safety in every situation. For example if you live in a community where people are harassed because of beliefs, color, or sexuality it is probable a safe bet to keep your beliefs to yourself. Instead find facebook groups, blogs or online forums that you can speak freely in. There are a lot of "us" online.

Have a Blessed day )0(

Mental Health Matters!

So it is Sunday and I have decided that Sunday's will be a little more of a serious topic. Each Sunday I will try and pick something that matters very strongly to me. Today is Adult Mental Health, and stigma!!!!

    Mental Health is a touchy subject that most people just don't talk about. The stigma of having a mental illness is still there and around. The what ifs keep most people in the dark. What if my employer finds out? What if my friends find out? What if my family knows? Will people think I am a bad parent? What if, What if, What if??????????   Mental illness scares people and people with mental illness tend to keep it a secret, to them selves and suffer in silence. Sometimes so afraid that they won't even get help. Just 50% of people would tell a co-worker that they had a family member with a mental illness. Where as 72% would talk about cancer, and 68% would discuss diabetes. 46% of Canadians think people use the term mental illness as an excuse for bad behavior, and 27% are fearful of being around people who suffer from serious mental illness.(more statistics CAMH satistics )

  If you don't have a mental illness try and imagine the years of feeling like you are living in a deep dark hole with no way to get out. That there is nothing for you, and the world is moving on around you but you are stuck. Sometimes the signs of mental illness are very obvious such as some people with schizophrenia. Talking to themselves out loud, they may look dirty and seem scattered. If you walk by a person like this would you look them in the eye???? Would you say hello if they said hello to you?? Or are you so afraid you just walk right on by like they are not even there? Did you know that most people with this diagnosis are harmless to others but do tend to cause more harm to themselves.

 Lets look at other mental health issues you may not know it but I would put money on it that you know someone with a mental illness. If you were to find out that they had one would it change your relationship with them? Would you think they weren't a good parent all of a sudden ?  If you had a friend who tried to end their life would you continue to talk to them? If they were hospitalized on a mental health ward would you visit them?

     Suffering in silence can lead to suicide attempts and sadly this does take people every year. Unless you have ever been in the spot of feeling like ending it all, it is hard to understand. Let me try and explain a little   
      Imagine the saddest you have ever been, now imagine a time when you felt unworthy, or hopeless. Put all of those together. Imagine that there is an ache right to the core of who you are, remember earlier when I said imagine feeling like living in a deep dark hole. Now add insomnia, lack of ambition feeling like a huge burden to everyone around. Imagine seeing no light at the end of the tunnel ever. It's not long until you start to feel like people would be better off with out you, or that death may seem like the only way out.

Lots of people with mental illness can put on a pretty good show to the outside world for a while. They look happy on the outside seem to hold it together. This is exhausting and usually will end up in a crash and burn. So for those with mental illness please please get help. You don't have to suffer in silence. There is help out there and there are people who truly do understand what it feels like. I am not saying it is easy by any stretch of the imagination, Please don't give up!
 
   For those of you with out mental illness, try not to be afraid. People with mental illness are not like what is portrayed in movies and on t.v, please try to be unafraid and understanding. Educate yourself because what some one with a mental health illness needs is friends, family and support. Not to feel more isolated, or "strange"   

Links to get help
CAMH (Centre for Addiction and Mental Health)
Canadian Mental Health Association
National Alliance on Mental Illness

Are you feeling suicidal now!!!

Please stop and get help call a crisis line, your family Dr., a friend or family member, go to the local hospital or call 911!!!!  

Links

The Samaritans  -
The Samaritans are a charity, founded in 1953, which exists to provide confidential emotional support to any person, who is suicidal or despairing.
Trained volunteers provide this service 24 hours every day. It is free. You are guaranteed absolute confidentiality and that you will not be judged. You can call, or chat with someone through email. This is a free service. 
Feeling suicidal read this first!!!!!!



After reading all this would you feel differently knowing that the person who wrote it had a mental illness? Would it make you less likely to follow this blog?

I am going to end with a quote I have hanging on my wall that I try and read when things get low for me. "To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world"
 Lastly seriously give someone a hug today and tell them you love them it may mean more to them then you may ever know.

Have a Blessed Day
)0(

Dressing modestly my choice!

How did I come to dress modestly? I think to some degree I always have, but like others I wore tank tops, and v-neck shirts, my skirts have always been longer knee or below I prefer ankle length. So when did this become a everyday deliberate choice that I think about when dressing in the morning? Gradually over time I guess until I got to this point. I don't do it for any other reason then it is what I am comfortable in. 

I feel like society has gone from one extreme to another. Back when women had to dress very modestly, then gradually we seem to have swung the pendulum so far in the other direction that there seems to be a growing number of women going back to modest dressing. Women judge them selves so harsh. My breast are not big enough compared to ...... I will never be skinny enough to look like...... Yes I am just as guilty of this as most women! . I personally especially since I have a daughter have started to really wonder why everything has to be so hyper sexualized. That as women and little girls we seem to be bombarded that it is more important what our weight is, what we wear then who we are. I think that this is a sad statement about what society has become and how objectified women's bodies have become. Take facebook taking down pictures of breastfeeding mothers because they were deemed inappropriate or sexual. That is why women have breasts to feed our children, yet lots of people find this natural act disgusting and unnatural.

   There is also the fact that people perceive Pagan's in a certain light and seem to expect that we dress in a certain way, or that we are always sky clad. Like the diversity of paths that can be followed so are the styles and personality of Pagan's. Some people have no problem with sky clad, or short shorts, and skirts, some like to dress all in black, some like to dress modest and some you would never know they were Pagan they look like "everyday people" It is all what ever you are comfortable with.
   For this post I am really only going to talk about me. Everyone needs to discover who they are, and what they feel good in. Yes their are modestly dressed Pagans and groups for them. Dressing modestly means something different to everyone, there are some general rules that most people who dress modestly follow. Wikihow's 4 ways to dress modestly.

So how do I dress modestly my skirts all fall at knee length or longer and even for the knee length ones I some times wear leggings under them. I also have a skirt with a slit up the side leggings are perfect for these to. I am not a huge fan of pantyhose but love tights especially in the winter. Layer, layer, layer. Layering is in for most styles anyways so it is perfect for those that want to dress modest.  I have shirts that I love but the neck line might scoop to deep, or it is like a tank top. So you can layer different items and still keep your favorite clothing. You don't have to loose your style for the sake of modesty. I have a pair of Doc Martin high boots that I love, I saved up for them. Changed my black laces for para-cord laces that are bright pink and purple. With a skirt (with or without leggings) some layering on top and I can rock an outfit. Modestly dressing doesn't have to be all black, brown or white (unless that is the look you are going for) It can have style and pzazz. Rock out some jewelry, if you head cover rock out different styles of coverings and colors. Or if you don't there are lots of different options to do with your hair.

Have fun and play around, not matter what your size (I am a plus size girl) and when looking for clothing just  look around a little more. Check out  stores and second hand stores, stuff is out there you just have to find it. If you find a shirt that you love but are worried about the neck line think of how you can layer it, and get it. 




Some things I have that I think are awesome for helping to dress modestly  

My sister introduced these to me they are called Cami-flage they attach to your bra and are great because you can adjust them to any height you like!!! They come in virtually any color. I got a pack of 6 for about 6.95

Wearing a Cami-flage high and covering my chest tattoo, plus a purple scoop neck tunic with one of my favorite shirts.

 

Scoop neck tunic extra long. These shirts are great because you can wear shorter shirts not have to worry about you belly showing when you lift your arms and the layering look is great.

Cotton leggings that can be wore under shorter skirts, for warmth in the winter or under anything your heart desires. 

Knit cover ups or shrugs are great, I have short sleeve and long and in different colors. Covering your shoulders if you feel the need to.

A poncho this one has silver flicks all the way through it that can be used to fancy up an outfit.

Some days I also want to go for the plain look and may just wear black, blue and tone things down a lot. When I am at home sure I will wear tank tops. But being modest doesn't have to mean having no style. Figure out what your style is, maybe it is modest or maybe not, maybe you rock heels, or wear flats, maybe you are more of a chameleon and your style is always changing.  Just remember no matter the size of your waist, your height, color, or where you are from be yourself, because there is nothing more beautiful in a women then that!

Have a blessed day!!!
)0(